1 00:02:04,909 --> 00:02:06,851 Missed me. 2 00:02:08,024 --> 00:02:09,554 Hey! 3 00:02:13,115 --> 00:02:16,724 - Quick. More bullets. - Sorry, pudding, that was the last clip. 4 00:02:16,900 --> 00:02:19,241 You know how expensive they are. 5 00:02:23,163 --> 00:02:25,104 Sounds like someone turned off your cash flow. 6 00:02:25,273 --> 00:02:28,344 If it's a flow you want, I'm happy to oblige. 7 00:02:36,660 --> 00:02:38,328 My eye! 8 00:02:41,785 --> 00:02:43,692 Sucker. 9 00:02:48,081 --> 00:02:49,714 Come on! 10 00:03:00,607 --> 00:03:03,108 Well, that was a complete fiasco. 11 00:03:03,286 --> 00:03:06,791 If we weren't so strapped for cash, I'd never have touched this job. 12 00:03:06,971 --> 00:03:10,248 - Give me the loot. - Don't you have it? 13 00:03:10,755 --> 00:03:15,369 Me? You were the last one to... I thought I told you to get gas! 14 00:03:15,545 --> 00:03:18,251 We're broke, remember? What was I supposed to do... 15 00:03:18,425 --> 00:03:20,732 fill the tank, shoot the guy and drive off? 16 00:03:23,115 --> 00:03:25,490 Now you tell me. 17 00:03:31,253 --> 00:03:32,623 Time to eject. 18 00:03:41,467 --> 00:03:46,754 - Hey, where's mine? - Sorry, kiddo. I could only afford one. 19 00:03:46,927 --> 00:03:50,341 You cheap, penny-pinching, pasty-faced creep! 20 00:03:50,778 --> 00:03:54,319 I'll get you for this, you lousy tightwad! 21 00:04:02,970 --> 00:04:06,921 A letter came for you today, Mr. Kerr. 22 00:04:07,090 --> 00:04:10,664 By the way, you're two weeks late with your rent. 23 00:04:11,344 --> 00:04:13,410 Sue me. 24 00:04:18,879 --> 00:04:22,350 Alas, the bitter jest of fate. 25 00:04:22,530 --> 00:04:26,240 The once-mighty Joker without two nickels to rub together. 26 00:04:30,601 --> 00:04:33,010 Yeah, yeah. You're hungry, I'm hungry. 27 00:04:33,180 --> 00:04:36,252 Do me a favor and eat each other, will you? 28 00:04:40,615 --> 00:04:43,687 "Dear sir, we regret to inform you of the passing... 29 00:04:43,865 --> 00:04:46,502 of Mr. Edward, a.k.a. "King" Barlowe..." 30 00:04:46,677 --> 00:04:48,378 There's good news. I hated him. 31 00:04:48,553 --> 00:04:52,298 "... who, in accordance with his last wishes, has bequeathed to you the total... 32 00:04:52,806 --> 00:04:57,020 two hundred and fifty million dollars." 33 00:05:00,878 --> 00:05:02,512 Good old King Barlowe. 34 00:05:02,687 --> 00:05:06,136 I take back almost all the nasty things I ever said about him. 35 00:05:08,280 --> 00:05:13,933 Bud, Lou, our ship has come in, boys. We're gonna spend, spend, spend. 36 00:05:14,309 --> 00:05:17,518 And I know just what we'll buy first. 37 00:05:17,691 --> 00:05:20,969 If a man's filled with glee, that man must go free. 38 00:05:21,409 --> 00:05:23,979 That was the scene outside the city courthouse today... 39 00:05:24,156 --> 00:05:25,925 where, after weeks of litigation... 40 00:05:26,098 --> 00:05:28,575 the Joker's criminal record has been wiped clean... 41 00:05:28,744 --> 00:05:32,021 by his one-time gangland rival, King Barlowe. 42 00:05:32,294 --> 00:05:36,576 As followers of this remarkable story know, Gotham's most notorious criminal... 43 00:05:36,749 --> 00:05:40,632 was recently willed a huge fortune in cash, jewels and gold. 44 00:05:40,801 --> 00:05:44,947 It doesn't make sense. King hated the Joker, but he left him everything. 45 00:05:45,121 --> 00:05:49,335 I was King's bodyguard for 10 years, and he left me zip. 46 00:05:51,385 --> 00:05:54,057 Armed with his newfound wealth, the Joker put together... 47 00:05:54,232 --> 00:05:58,308 a pricey defense team to polish his less-than-sterling reputation. 48 00:05:58,485 --> 00:06:02,231 The Joker is not some animal to be locked away in a cage. 49 00:06:02,403 --> 00:06:04,504 He's a thinking, feeling human being. 50 00:06:06,389 --> 00:06:10,066 I subjected him to a thorough psychological examination... 51 00:06:10,241 --> 00:06:13,015 assessing his subconscious reflex responses... 52 00:06:13,188 --> 00:06:15,631 to the most provocative of stimuli. 53 00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:19,375 And I can safely say he is a criminal no more. 54 00:06:19,552 --> 00:06:23,902 How do you respond to charges that Joker is simply bribing his way to freedom? 55 00:06:24,073 --> 00:06:27,145 I won't even dignify that with a response. 56 00:06:29,900 --> 00:06:34,148 And there you have it. At this hour, the Joker is not only a free man... 57 00:06:34,322 --> 00:06:36,629 - ... but a wealthy one. - There's justice for you. 58 00:06:37,236 --> 00:06:41,050 Well, now that he's rich, maybe he'll give up crime. 59 00:06:41,355 --> 00:06:43,764 Right. I'll call Dick. 60 00:06:48,757 --> 00:06:50,458 You sure the Joker's inside? 61 00:06:50,632 --> 00:06:52,767 Penguin's throwing him a "going legit" party. 62 00:06:52,944 --> 00:06:54,748 Sorry, we're full up tonight. 63 00:06:59,307 --> 00:07:03,852 Gee, you'd never think Penguin would turn away the police commissioner's daughter. 64 00:07:04,029 --> 00:07:09,111 Egad, Gordon's brat. My dear Miss Gordon, how nice to see you. 65 00:07:09,288 --> 00:07:14,073 Welcome, have fun. And by all means, send the bill to me. 66 00:07:14,245 --> 00:07:18,321 - Thank you, Mr. Cobblepot. - Lousy little freeloader. 67 00:07:46,197 --> 00:07:50,810 - What's the scheme this time, Joker? - No scheme at all, old bird. 68 00:07:50,986 --> 00:07:53,829 I'm free, I'm rich and I'm loving it. 69 00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:57,677 I'm sure old Batboy is eating his heart out. 70 00:07:58,890 --> 00:08:02,030 Living well is the best revenge. 71 00:08:12,957 --> 00:08:14,521 All set? 72 00:08:16,440 --> 00:08:18,678 Let's do it. 73 00:08:21,698 --> 00:08:23,136 Everybody down! 74 00:08:27,894 --> 00:08:30,132 Not you, clown. 75 00:08:31,109 --> 00:08:33,747 I should have been the one to get Barlowe's money. 76 00:08:33,923 --> 00:08:37,497 At least I'll make sure you'll never enjoy it. 77 00:08:41,961 --> 00:08:45,432 I hope you've made out your will, Joker. 78 00:09:11,668 --> 00:09:14,272 Well done, kiddies. 79 00:09:14,750 --> 00:09:18,564 We were trying to save innocent lives. You're just an unpleasant bonus. 80 00:09:20,008 --> 00:09:23,583 Be that as it may, your grateful Uncle Joker wants to thank you. 81 00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:26,831 Here, stick this in your piggy banks. 82 00:09:34,778 --> 00:09:37,781 Let the good times roll! 83 00:10:52,715 --> 00:10:55,193 You're pathetic, you know that? 84 00:10:55,361 --> 00:10:58,775 Come on, Red. So Mr. J got a little stressed over money. 85 00:10:58,945 --> 00:11:02,050 Now that he's loaded, pudding will buy my way out too. 86 00:11:02,227 --> 00:11:05,139 Oh, yeah, right. Sure thing, Harl. 87 00:11:05,308 --> 00:11:08,722 "Joker seeks new henchgirl"? 88 00:11:11,270 --> 00:11:13,005 I'll kill him! 89 00:11:17,834 --> 00:11:21,043 Hey, boss. Why didn't you buy Harley a ticket out of the bin too? 90 00:11:21,418 --> 00:11:24,330 Now, now, Ernie. Mustn't be too extravagant. 91 00:11:24,533 --> 00:11:27,982 Besides, it's cheaper to hire a new one. 92 00:11:28,920 --> 00:11:30,656 Too fat. 93 00:11:31,566 --> 00:11:33,541 Too small. 94 00:11:34,212 --> 00:11:35,947 Too old. 95 00:11:42,015 --> 00:11:43,488 No. 96 00:11:46,872 --> 00:11:48,402 Darn! 97 00:11:58,728 --> 00:12:02,542 Drown the kids and shoot the neighbors. We've got a winner. 98 00:12:03,417 --> 00:12:08,305 Thank you, Mr. G. I promise I'll be the best Harley ever. 99 00:12:08,709 --> 00:12:10,581 Maybe I should've hired the fat guy. 100 00:12:11,020 --> 00:12:14,023 Ernie, take fake Harley here and show her the ropes. 101 00:12:14,202 --> 00:12:17,879 - You got it. - This job has a 401 (k) plan, right? 102 00:12:18,053 --> 00:12:20,794 - Sure. - Excuse me, Mr. Joker. 103 00:12:20,967 --> 00:12:25,786 Sorry, the henchgirl role has been filled. And quite nicely too. 104 00:12:26,896 --> 00:12:30,744 Oh, no, sir. I'm not here for a job. My name is Perry. 105 00:12:30,948 --> 00:12:34,762 - I'm from the Internal Revenue Service. - Oh, yes. 106 00:12:34,967 --> 00:12:37,102 Seems I've heard of that little organization. 107 00:12:37,277 --> 00:12:40,224 Then you must realize, as Mr. Barlowe's sole beneficiary... 108 00:12:40,393 --> 00:12:42,632 you owe us a tidy bit of inheritance tax. 109 00:12:42,804 --> 00:12:48,526 Now, 250 million minus Uncle Sam's current state and federal percentages... 110 00:12:50,541 --> 00:12:52,984 This should clear up your account. 111 00:12:57,407 --> 00:12:59,211 A hundred and thirty-seven million? 112 00:12:59,382 --> 00:13:02,728 Yes, and if I don't pay up, I'll go to jail for tax evasion. 113 00:13:03,168 --> 00:13:08,683 I'm crazy enough to take on Batman. But the IRS? No, thank you. 114 00:13:12,110 --> 00:13:17,363 - Hey, Mr. G, this money looks weird. - What do you mean? 115 00:13:18,473 --> 00:13:22,893 It's a plain old pack of hundreds. See? There's Ben Franklin's chubby little... 116 00:13:23,062 --> 00:13:25,505 What? King Barlowe? 117 00:13:28,454 --> 00:13:33,274 - He's on this stack. And this one. - He's on every one of these thousands. 118 00:13:33,679 --> 00:13:37,093 - I don't understand. - Hey, boss. 119 00:13:38,871 --> 00:13:40,778 I found this. 120 00:13:42,956 --> 00:13:45,628 Hiya, Joker. If you're playing this tape... 121 00:13:45,804 --> 00:13:48,178 you probably figured out you've been had. 122 00:13:48,348 --> 00:13:50,757 Yeah, I left you some cash, but only 10 million... 123 00:13:50,928 --> 00:13:53,029 which, knowing you, you've already blown. 124 00:13:53,205 --> 00:13:58,961 All the other stuff, money, jewels and gold, it's all fake. 125 00:13:59,703 --> 00:14:03,745 See? I always hated your guts, and this was the perfect payback. 126 00:14:04,023 --> 00:14:06,593 By now you're probably out of real money. 127 00:14:06,769 --> 00:14:10,446 The IRS is after you. And you can't admit I fooled you... 128 00:14:10,621 --> 00:14:13,864 or you'll be the laughingstock of the underworld. 129 00:14:14,037 --> 00:14:19,290 The joke's on you, sucker. I got the last laugh after all. 130 00:14:42,036 --> 00:14:44,743 If I don't pay my taxes, I'll go to jail... 131 00:14:44,917 --> 00:14:47,589 but if I admit Barlowe duped me, I'll look like a fool. 132 00:14:47,764 --> 00:14:50,676 You could raise cash by pulling one of your classic routines. 133 00:14:50,846 --> 00:14:53,826 - Like them laughing fish. - Good idea, Ernie. 134 00:14:53,993 --> 00:14:59,611 Let's let Batman know I did it so he can kick my keister right back into Arkham. 135 00:15:03,372 --> 00:15:04,901 Dope. 136 00:15:07,123 --> 00:15:12,513 - Fake Harley, any ideas? - Anything you say, Mr. G. 137 00:15:17,103 --> 00:15:18,667 No, boss! 138 00:15:21,625 --> 00:15:24,125 Who'd ever think I'd miss the real one? 139 00:15:26,347 --> 00:15:28,585 Harley Quinn's escaped! 140 00:15:30,232 --> 00:15:33,578 - Seal all exits! - Maybe she went down the laundry chute. 141 00:15:33,748 --> 00:15:36,923 None of these yahoos are crazy enough to pull that old stunt. 142 00:15:37,868 --> 00:15:41,876 Help, help! Ivy! Anybody! Get me out of here! 143 00:15:45,003 --> 00:15:49,479 My dear Mr. Wayne, I'm delighted to have you in my humble nest. 144 00:15:49,658 --> 00:15:52,101 I thought I'd take in the atmosphere. 145 00:15:54,480 --> 00:15:59,059 Well, well, Bruce Wayne. Join me. A bottle of your best, my dear. 146 00:15:59,236 --> 00:16:02,548 - For my guest. - You'll understand if I refuse. 147 00:16:02,720 --> 00:16:05,666 The last time we met, you tried to throw me off a building. 148 00:16:06,036 --> 00:16:10,683 I did? Well, that was so long ago. 149 00:16:10,859 --> 00:16:12,697 It was last month. 150 00:16:22,714 --> 00:16:25,249 Well, gotta be going. 151 00:16:30,552 --> 00:16:33,155 This is starting to get to me. 152 00:16:34,671 --> 00:16:36,704 Should have used more makeup, Ernie. 153 00:16:38,892 --> 00:16:41,838 Why the disguise, Ernie? Where is he? 154 00:16:42,007 --> 00:16:45,615 - I don't know what you're talking about. - He can't threaten my guests. 155 00:16:45,791 --> 00:16:49,605 - Let me jog your memory. - No! 156 00:17:09,504 --> 00:17:11,742 Armored car one, report. 157 00:17:11,915 --> 00:17:15,957 Routine money disbursal from Gotham Mint proceeding as planned. 158 00:17:16,437 --> 00:17:18,880 Good. Your police escort is waiting. 159 00:17:45,508 --> 00:17:47,380 Stop! 160 00:18:01,517 --> 00:18:03,515 No laughing gas, no grins... 161 00:18:03,694 --> 00:18:06,834 no way Batboy can trace this back to me. 162 00:18:12,737 --> 00:18:15,237 Hey, keep the boat in the water. 163 00:18:15,416 --> 00:18:18,260 This definitely wasn't in the job description. 164 00:18:30,421 --> 00:18:33,699 It's been so long since I've seen the real thing. 165 00:18:33,870 --> 00:18:38,016 Hello, Ben, George, Abe. 166 00:18:42,645 --> 00:18:44,746 No! 167 00:19:04,918 --> 00:19:06,859 No! My fortune! 168 00:19:21,028 --> 00:19:23,403 Don't be stupid. You can't save that money. 169 00:19:23,674 --> 00:19:28,425 I don't want to save it, I want to go with it. 170 00:19:34,291 --> 00:19:37,031 You'd better call your fancy lawyers. 171 00:19:37,205 --> 00:19:38,677 Here. 172 00:19:41,492 --> 00:19:43,022 It's on me. 173 00:19:46,415 --> 00:19:50,092 Honest, they told me it was an Equity gig. 174 00:20:02,022 --> 00:20:04,431 Okay, get him out of here. 175 00:20:06,141 --> 00:20:09,121 After all, it's only money. 176 00:20:10,195 --> 00:20:13,198 So I'll let the taxpayers foot my bill again. 177 00:20:13,376 --> 00:20:16,380 Besides, it'll be nice to see the old gang. 178 00:20:16,558 --> 00:20:19,333 One of them's dying to see you too, pudding. 179 00:20:19,505 --> 00:20:22,246 - Harley? - The one and only. 180 00:20:22,419 --> 00:20:25,697 You... You don't know how happy I am to see you. 181 00:20:25,868 --> 00:20:28,540 Welcome to the club. 182 00:20:31,060 --> 00:20:35,034 Now, baby, I can explain.