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00:00:04,171 --> 00:00:07,007
(SINGING) The Simpsons
2
00:00:18,059 --> 00:00:19,561
(SCHOOL BELL RINGING)
3
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(HORN BELLOWING)
4
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(PLAYING DIFFERENT TUNE)
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(TIRES SCREECHING)
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D'oh!
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(SCREAMS)
8
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(BRAKES SCREECHING)
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(SNOWBALL ll SQUEALING)
10
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(CHICKENS CLUCKING)
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Stupid shopping list,
turning food into work.
12
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Bart! Look at me!
I'm doing something!
13
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(EXCLAIMS)
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You better
settle down, boy,
15
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or I'll drag you into the blind
spot of that security camera
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and beat you with one of those big thick
women's magazines with all the ads in it.
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Mr. Homer, why don't you
forget your worries with this,
18
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the last lottery ticket
on the roll.
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(SING-SONG) They say the last one
is lucky unlike all the others.
20
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Lucky, or not.
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You make a good case.
I'll take it!
22
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Dad! Look at me!
Look at me!
23
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Cannonball!
24
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(SCREAMS)
25
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I'll take that last
lottery ticket, Apu.
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(EXCLAIMS)
27
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(LAUGHS) Again!
28
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(BART GRUNTING)
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LENNY: lwon! lwon!
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$50,000!
Ponder this, Homer.
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This ticket would've been yours if
your kid hadn't been screwing around!
32
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That is true. Another ironic
tale of the Kwik-E-Mart.
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(APU LAUGHS EVILLY)
34
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You just cost
me $200,000!
35
00:02:23,393 --> 00:02:26,896
I thought it was 50. I was
gonna bet it on the dogs!
36
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All the groceries seem to
have been balled up in anger.
37
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That kid has become
a Dennis-level menace!
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Now, Homer,
boys will be boys.
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Bart cost us $50,000!
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(GRUNTS ANGRILY)
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(CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY)
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(GROANS)
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I'm going to Moe's.
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(SINGING) Lenny! Lenny!
He's our guy!
45
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Got the ticket
Homer didn't buy!
46
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(SIGHS)
47
00:03:05,769 --> 00:03:07,896
Cheer up, Homer.
The drinks are on Lenny.
48
00:03:07,979 --> 00:03:10,732
I don't want your pity booze.
I'll pay for it myself.
49
00:03:11,274 --> 00:03:13,568
I gotta check with Lenny on that.
Is that all right, Lenny?
50
00:03:13,651 --> 00:03:16,488
Nope! Lucky Lenny's buying
all the drinks tonight!
51
00:03:16,571 --> 00:03:20,367
Sorry, Homer. But here's a compromise.
Why don't you both pay for the drink?
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And tip.
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I just want to tell you all that
even before I won this money,
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I was the luckiest guy in the world
because I've got friends like you.
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ALL: Aww.
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That's why I'm spending my
remaining scratcher winnings
57
00:03:34,547 --> 00:03:37,008
on a kick-ass party
for all my friends!
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(ALL CHEERING)
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(LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY)
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(DEEP SIGH)
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Where's Bart? We're gonna
be late for Lenny's party.
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BART: Don't waste
your shot, Bart.
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You've got just enough
cat pee to soak two dorks.
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00:03:55,318 --> 00:03:56,361
(TODD LAUGHS)
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00:03:59,447 --> 00:04:02,534
Bart Simpson! Did you
just spray water on me?
66
00:04:03,326 --> 00:04:05,203
It was water this morning.
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00:04:05,286 --> 00:04:06,287
(GRUNTS)
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00:04:06,579 --> 00:04:10,417
Dang that Bart! Thanks to him,
I have to wear my backup dress,
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00:04:10,500 --> 00:04:12,210
which makes
my arms look fat.
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You look great!
71
00:04:14,337 --> 00:04:15,296
Ha-ha!
72
00:04:15,380 --> 00:04:17,382
You feel self-conscious!
73
00:04:17,465 --> 00:04:18,925
(GRUNTS ANGRILY)
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00:04:19,008 --> 00:04:21,428
Why can't our
son just behave?
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00:04:21,511 --> 00:04:26,057
Well, Marge, you did have that one sip
of alcohol while you were pregnant.
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I now christen this ship,
the USS Float and Shoot.
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(MARGE GASPS)
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(SINGING) Ay, caramba!
Ay, caramba!
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That was unforgivable.
80
00:04:46,619 --> 00:04:50,915
But I'm beginning to think that Bart's
bad behavior is more than just a phase.
81
00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:53,793
Mom! Bart's flicking
boogers on me!
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00:04:53,877 --> 00:04:57,839
They're not boogers! They're clumps of
rubber cement that I stored in my nose.
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Oh!
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Stop it, both of you! Don't make me
drive into that tree! You know I will!
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(TIRES SQUEALING)
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No flicking boogers!
And no driving into trees!
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00:05:16,357 --> 00:05:17,817
BOTH: Yes, ma'am.
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(PIANO PLAYING SLOW MUSIC)
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Wow, Lenny went
all out.
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00:05:28,411 --> 00:05:32,749
ANNOUNCER: In the beginning, there
was darkness. So God created man.
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00:05:32,832 --> 00:05:37,545
But man was alone. God
created the animals and birds.
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(ELEPHANT TRUMPETING)
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But man was still lonely.
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00:05:41,674 --> 00:05:43,176
(LEOPARD CATERWAULING)
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00:05:43,259 --> 00:05:46,888
So God said,
let there be friends!
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(SINGING) Thank you
for being a friend
97
00:05:49,891 --> 00:05:52,519
Travel down the road
and back again
98
00:05:52,936 --> 00:05:57,357
Your heart is true
You're a pal and a confidant
99
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Thank you for being a friend
Thank you for being a friend
100
00:06:04,113 --> 00:06:06,407
Thank you for
being a friend
101
00:06:06,491 --> 00:06:09,202
Thank you for letting me take
home the centerpiece!
102
00:06:09,285 --> 00:06:11,788
These are going right
on my mom's grave!
103
00:06:14,249 --> 00:06:16,543
Thank you for
being a friend
104
00:06:17,919 --> 00:06:22,840
Lenny, it was pretty cool of you to
spend your lotto winnings on your pals.
105
00:06:22,924 --> 00:06:25,093
It was worth it so everyone
could have a wonderful evening
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and go home with a gift bag.
107
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Hmm.
108
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A vacuuming robot?
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(LAUGHS EVILLY)
110
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Now before you all leave, I know everyone
hates vacuuming and loves robots!
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(ALL EXCLAIM)
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(ALL EXCLAIMING IN FEAR)
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(PANTING)
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(SCREAMS)
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These innocent robots couldn't
have done this on their own.
116
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Someone would've had
to turn them all on at once
117
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and imbue them with some
kind of malevolent sentience.
118
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Yep, there it is.
119
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Well, whoever did this must
be long gone by now, Chief.
120
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I don't know how
we'll ever catch him.
121
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Kill, kill, kill!
122
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Hold it right there, Bart. Can you
tell us anything about who did this?
123
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VAC-U-BOT:
Bart make bot bad.
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(ALL MURMURING ANGRILY)
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I can explain.
Kill the Child!
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(DRESS RIPPING)
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(EXCLAIMS IN ANGER)
128
00:07:48,176 --> 00:07:52,513
Bart, I've had it with you! I'm
taking away all your TV privileges.
129
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You already did that.
Okay, then video games.
130
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That, too. No more
non-dice board games!
131
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What? You can't take my Balderdash!
I just did!
132
00:08:01,731 --> 00:08:02,732
(BART GRUNTS ANGRILY)
133
00:08:03,399 --> 00:08:07,654
I don't mean to be bad. I don't
know why I do the things I do.
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(SIGHS)
135
00:08:14,410 --> 00:08:16,913
No one understands me. lwish
I had a different family.
136
00:08:17,121 --> 00:08:19,248
SIMON: (IN CULTURED VOICE)
I feel exactly the same way.
137
00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:21,918
Oh, my God.
138
00:08:22,585 --> 00:08:24,712
You look like
a dorky version of me!
139
00:08:24,796 --> 00:08:27,757
And you look like a
dimwitted version of me!
140
00:08:28,132 --> 00:08:31,010
And you two are
10-year-old versions of me.
141
00:08:31,094 --> 00:08:33,429
The three of us could create
quite a lot of mischief.
142
00:08:33,554 --> 00:08:37,058
But I have to fly back to New York.
That's where my wife and I live.
143
00:08:37,141 --> 00:08:39,727
That's her. You want to
see pictures of our kids?
144
00:08:43,272 --> 00:08:46,359
My name is Simon Woosterfield.
Woosterfield?
145
00:08:46,442 --> 00:08:49,028
Your family owns this place.
And Woosterfield Arena.
146
00:08:49,112 --> 00:08:51,614
Bonnie Raitt played there.
You guys must be loaded!
147
00:08:51,698 --> 00:08:55,159
Yes. You know, but the
funny thing about being rich
148
00:08:55,368 --> 00:08:57,620
is sometimes you
wake up feeling...
149
00:08:57,704 --> 00:09:00,081
Terrific? Incredible?
Happy as a clown?
150
00:09:00,331 --> 00:09:02,041
Yeah. I'm living
the dream.
151
00:09:02,125 --> 00:09:03,376
(COUGHING)
152
00:09:03,459 --> 00:09:04,460
(INHALES DEEPLY)
153
00:09:06,129 --> 00:09:08,673
Wouldn't it be hilarious
if we switched places
154
00:09:08,756 --> 00:09:10,967
and lived each other's
lives for a while?
155
00:09:11,718 --> 00:09:14,595
I don't know. I'm pretty
attached to my family. And...
156
00:09:14,679 --> 00:09:19,058
HOMER: Get out here, boy! I want to punish
you before I get drunk and merciful!
157
00:09:19,142 --> 00:09:20,101
Deal!
158
00:09:20,184 --> 00:09:22,770
My father's name is Homer.
My mother's name is Mom.
159
00:09:22,854 --> 00:09:24,939
My sister's name is Lisa
but everyone calls her Loser.
160
00:09:25,022 --> 00:09:26,065
(LAUGHING)
161
00:09:26,274 --> 00:09:27,525
My butler's
name is Chester.
162
00:09:27,608 --> 00:09:29,569
I have a brother named Devon
and a sister named Quenley.
163
00:09:29,652 --> 00:09:31,571
And my horse
is called Shadowfax.
164
00:09:31,654 --> 00:09:34,157
You can't miss him. He's the
only Lipizzaner in our stable.
165
00:09:34,323 --> 00:09:35,658
Lipizzaner, got it.
166
00:09:37,243 --> 00:09:39,287
There you are,
Master Simon.
167
00:09:40,455 --> 00:09:44,792
Thank you, Lipizzaner. As you say, sir.
Watch your head.
168
00:09:44,917 --> 00:09:45,918
BART: Ow.
169
00:09:46,711 --> 00:09:47,920
(CAR ENGINE STARTING)
170
00:09:48,421 --> 00:09:50,673
(HOMER GRUNTING ANGRILY)
171
00:09:50,757 --> 00:09:52,508
You ruin everything!
172
00:09:52,675 --> 00:09:55,344
Driver, laugh at those people for me.
My pleasure, sir.
173
00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:57,764
(CHESTER LAUGHS FALSELY)
174
00:10:05,188 --> 00:10:10,359
McMansion, McMansion,
McMansion, McDonald's?
175
00:10:11,235 --> 00:10:12,236
McDreamy.
176
00:10:13,029 --> 00:10:14,322
McStea my.
177
00:10:14,906 --> 00:10:19,202
McMansion, Fleetwood Mac
and Macaulay Culkin!
178
00:10:23,039 --> 00:10:27,084
And this is your home, sir. But
of course you already knew that.
179
00:10:27,752 --> 00:10:28,753
BART: Awesome.
180
00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:30,379
Awesome!
181
00:10:30,546 --> 00:10:31,839
Awesome!
182
00:10:33,424 --> 00:10:34,467
(EXCLAIMS DISINTERESTEDLY)
183
00:10:35,885 --> 00:10:38,304
This is my bedroom?
184
00:10:38,387 --> 00:10:40,306
A candy corn volcano?
185
00:10:40,389 --> 00:10:42,391
A ceiling from
Saddam's palace?
186
00:10:43,267 --> 00:10:47,980
Ooh! And a racecar bed!
That really races!
187
00:10:50,107 --> 00:10:52,860
Wow. Cool poster of Joe Montana.
It's not a poster.
188
00:10:52,944 --> 00:10:53,945
(BART SCREAMS)
189
00:10:54,028 --> 00:10:55,029
I'm the real deal.
190
00:10:55,112 --> 00:10:59,075
And every day I stand here, the family
donates a million dollars to Notre Dame.
191
00:10:59,242 --> 00:11:01,244
Did you know the words
"Notre Dame" are French
192
00:11:01,327 --> 00:11:02,912
but the team is
the Fighting Irish?
193
00:11:03,079 --> 00:11:04,747
That's the kind of thing
I think about in here.
194
00:11:04,872 --> 00:11:07,083
Back in the poster, Gabby.
Yes, sir.
195
00:11:11,379 --> 00:11:14,090
Milhouse, it's me. Check out
the caller ID on your phone.
196
00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:18,010
Blocked number? That
service is 3.65 a month!
197
00:11:18,386 --> 00:11:21,264
Did you switch places
with a millionaire kid
198
00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:22,849
who looks just like you?
199
00:11:22,932 --> 00:11:24,934
Just sit tight.
I'm sending a car.
200
00:11:31,607 --> 00:11:33,234
Why are these
noodles orange?
201
00:11:33,317 --> 00:11:36,571
I made it with Cheetos,
just like you like it.
202
00:11:36,654 --> 00:11:39,657
If the sauce is too thick,
I can add more root beer.
203
00:11:39,740 --> 00:11:41,075
Maybe I'm
just not hungry.
204
00:11:41,158 --> 00:11:43,286
Human garbage
can to the rescue!
205
00:11:44,954 --> 00:11:49,876
So at work today, we got a memo
saying everyone's getting new chairs.
206
00:11:49,959 --> 00:11:52,587
Father, could you...
Talk louder? You bet!
207
00:11:52,670 --> 00:11:56,340
Naturally I threw my old chair
in the Dumpster right away!
208
00:11:56,424 --> 00:11:59,468
But then Lenny said, "No.
That was the new chair.
209
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:03,306
"That memo was two months old." So
now I'm sitting on an orange crate.
210
00:12:03,431 --> 00:12:06,309
(LAUGHS) I never felt so... Will
you stop spitting food on me?
211
00:12:06,392 --> 00:12:07,393
Huh?
212
00:12:07,476 --> 00:12:10,438
Keep your meal in your mouth,
you semi-literate spew monkey!
213
00:12:10,521 --> 00:12:13,608
That's it, boy! You're
going to bed without supper!
214
00:12:17,361 --> 00:12:19,238
That was an odd
thing for Bart to say.
215
00:12:19,322 --> 00:12:22,658
Maybe he's going
through certain changes.
216
00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:26,078
If that boy thinks I'm paying to put
him through four years of puberty,
217
00:12:26,162 --> 00:12:27,163
forget it!
218
00:12:27,246 --> 00:12:30,041
Stupid kids, think I'm
made of hormones.
219
00:12:31,500 --> 00:12:33,753
(MUFFLED) Mister
La-Di-Da, uppity...
220
00:12:34,378 --> 00:12:38,174
This is the greatest great
hall I've ever eaten in, Bart.
221
00:12:38,549 --> 00:12:39,675
CHESTER: Huh?
222
00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:41,552
I mean, Simon.
223
00:12:41,636 --> 00:12:42,637
Oh.
224
00:12:46,265 --> 00:12:48,351
This must be my half-brother
and half-sister!
225
00:12:48,434 --> 00:12:52,563
They're beautiful.
I mean, just the girl.
226
00:12:52,647 --> 00:12:54,649
I didn't notice
the beautiful boy.
227
00:12:54,732 --> 00:12:58,611
So I said, "Dad, I wanted a
Range Rover, not a Land Rover."
228
00:12:58,694 --> 00:13:01,280
This is the worst Martin
Luther King Day ever!
229
00:13:01,364 --> 00:13:04,533
Well, well, if it isn't our
halfwit half-brother.
230
00:13:10,039 --> 00:13:11,082
Ow.
231
00:13:11,165 --> 00:13:13,250
The old hot spoon!
But why?
232
00:13:13,417 --> 00:13:16,462
Because you're our half-brother,
you're blocking our full inheritance,
233
00:13:16,545 --> 00:13:19,548
and we hate you.
Now I get it.
234
00:13:19,966 --> 00:13:21,050
QUENLEYI Hmm!
235
00:13:21,717 --> 00:13:24,428
Bart, I have a crush
on your new sister.
236
00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:26,180
You had a crush
on my old sister!
237
00:13:26,263 --> 00:13:28,891
Yeah. But that was
never gonna happen.
238
00:13:31,727 --> 00:13:36,148
Give me back my newspaper! MARGE:
Homer, it's not a real paper!
239
00:13:36,273 --> 00:13:38,109
It's a rubber chew toy!
240
00:13:38,192 --> 00:13:41,988
For your information, the Daily
Growl is the only newspaper
241
00:13:42,071 --> 00:13:44,448
that's not afraid to say
how great this country is!
242
00:13:45,199 --> 00:13:46,200
(LAUGHS TRIUMPHANTLY)
243
00:13:46,283 --> 00:13:49,996
How's the war going? We're winning?
That's great! And our standing abroad?
244
00:13:50,079 --> 00:13:51,080
(TOY SQUEAKING)
245
00:13:51,163 --> 00:13:52,456
Fantastic.
246
00:13:56,794 --> 00:13:58,462
This place is insane.
247
00:13:58,546 --> 00:14:00,506
Tonight I got sent to
bed without dinner!
248
00:14:00,589 --> 00:14:03,342
Yeah. Well, what's up with
your brother and sister?
249
00:14:03,426 --> 00:14:08,305
They're jealous because my father left
their mother to be with my mother, to...
250
00:14:08,889 --> 00:14:10,558
You lost me.
Well, gotta go.
251
00:14:10,641 --> 00:14:12,184
Enjoy the upper
lower middle class.
252
00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:14,270
(SIGHS)
253
00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:18,232
Bart, honey? I saw you
didn't like your dinner.
254
00:14:18,441 --> 00:14:22,028
So I thought you might like pepperoni
pizza with the crusts cut off.
255
00:14:22,111 --> 00:14:25,531
Now let me tuck you in,
fluff your pillow,
256
00:14:25,656 --> 00:14:29,618
and sprinkle a little fairy
dust to keep the monsters away.
257
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:30,953
(WHISPERS) It's cinnamon.
258
00:14:32,496 --> 00:14:34,123
Nighty-night,
sweetheart.
259
00:14:36,375 --> 00:14:37,835
I could get
used to this.
260
00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:44,133
Fancy party. This is like a rap
video before the rappers show up.
261
00:14:47,803 --> 00:14:50,598
Simon, have you ever seen
the family mausoleum?
262
00:14:50,681 --> 00:14:52,641
All the Woosterfields
will be buried here.
263
00:14:52,725 --> 00:14:56,645
Do you know that after 100 years,
dead bodies turn to red licorice?
264
00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:58,481
Whoa!
Let me at it!
265
00:15:02,276 --> 00:15:06,238
BART: Help! Let me out! I have
my doubts about this licorice!
266
00:15:07,031 --> 00:15:08,449
(MR. BURNS GROANS)
267
00:15:08,532 --> 00:15:12,244
Mr. Burns, I'm really sorry.
Nonsense, Young Woosterfield.
268
00:15:12,328 --> 00:15:16,290
Your fortune is greater than mine.
It is I who am at your service.
269
00:15:16,373 --> 00:15:18,167
Smithers, fetch us
some lemonade!
270
00:15:20,002 --> 00:15:21,712
(MR. BURNS GRUNTS WEAKLY)
271
00:15:21,796 --> 00:15:23,089
(SMITHERS PANTING)
272
00:15:23,172 --> 00:15:24,465
All they had was
Sunnytime Pink.
273
00:15:24,548 --> 00:15:26,926
Premix? I beg your
forgiveness, lad.
274
00:15:27,009 --> 00:15:29,470
Smithers, pour it
down your pants!
275
00:15:31,347 --> 00:15:34,809
Now squish about in those
pants, rewetting every hour!
276
00:15:35,059 --> 00:15:36,977
(SQUISHING)
277
00:15:39,021 --> 00:15:40,481
Come with me.
278
00:15:41,857 --> 00:15:45,736
You know, Master Simon, I too was
once the youngest in a wealthy family.
279
00:15:45,820 --> 00:15:47,905
You were once the
youngest of something?
280
00:15:47,988 --> 00:15:52,409
But fortune ended up smiling on me while
snuffing the life from my siblings.
281
00:15:52,701 --> 00:15:54,745
My older brother
was trampled by a horse.
282
00:15:54,829 --> 00:15:58,457
My sister died of a poisoned potato. My
twin was shot. That girl was stabbed.
283
00:15:58,541 --> 00:16:01,377
He ate another poisoned potato.
Spontaneous combustion.
284
00:16:01,460 --> 00:16:04,880
Fell down a well, potato, potato,
and impaled on the Chrysler Building.
285
00:16:05,047 --> 00:16:07,299
Wow.
Only you survived.
286
00:16:07,383 --> 00:16:10,302
(GASPS) Which means the
entire fortune went to you!
287
00:16:10,803 --> 00:16:14,223
Yes. Funny, that. A word of
caution, Young Woosterfield.
288
00:16:14,515 --> 00:16:18,394
Watch out for those closest to you.
Devon and Quenley?
289
00:16:18,477 --> 00:16:20,646
You don't know when they'll strike.
A boating accident,
290
00:16:20,729 --> 00:16:22,857
a mishap
during a ski trip.
291
00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:26,402
But rest assured, one way or
another, they will do you in.
292
00:16:26,485 --> 00:16:30,239
Oh, my God.
Simon set me up.
293
00:16:30,322 --> 00:16:32,449
And all this time I
thought he wanted the life
294
00:16:32,533 --> 00:16:34,660
of a stranger he met
in the bathroom.
295
00:16:34,743 --> 00:16:38,164
Now, would you care to continue this
conversation on the teeter-totter?
296
00:16:38,247 --> 00:16:39,999
(BART GRUNTING)
297
00:16:40,082 --> 00:16:41,959
Why won't you come down?
298
00:16:42,042 --> 00:16:45,671
I told you. I only weigh as
much as my clothes and keys.
299
00:16:51,385 --> 00:16:52,386
Hmm.
300
00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:57,892
So I looked down the barrel
of my Winchester rifle,
301
00:16:57,975 --> 00:17:01,896
I pulled the trigger,
and I shot that buffalo!
302
00:17:02,479 --> 00:17:06,066
You shot a buffalo?
(STUTTERING) You were listening?
303
00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:07,151
Oh.
304
00:17:07,234 --> 00:17:10,863
That means I gotta come up with
an ending for this nonsense!
305
00:17:10,946 --> 00:17:12,406
Bart, what are you doing?
306
00:17:12,489 --> 00:17:14,658
Politely listening
to our grandfather.
307
00:17:14,950 --> 00:17:15,993
Huh.
308
00:17:16,076 --> 00:17:20,164
It was the war to end all wars.
But Pepsi would not give up.
309
00:17:20,289 --> 00:17:22,625
They continued to
challenge Coke!
310
00:17:22,958 --> 00:17:23,959
(SIMON EXCLAIMS IN SHOCK)
311
00:17:24,084 --> 00:17:25,211
Okay, listen, you.
312
00:17:25,294 --> 00:17:27,796
I don't know who you are or what
you've done with the real Bart, but...
313
00:17:28,797 --> 00:17:31,634
Well, God help me,
I want him back.
314
00:17:31,800 --> 00:17:33,802
I don't know what
you're talking about.
315
00:17:34,845 --> 00:17:35,846
(CHUCKLES)
316
00:17:35,930 --> 00:17:38,224
The real Bart would've
thrown me out the window!
317
00:17:38,307 --> 00:17:39,725
He would have
defenestrated you?
318
00:17:39,808 --> 00:17:41,977
You're just digging
yourself even deeper.
319
00:17:42,811 --> 00:17:44,438
(GRUNTING)
320
00:17:44,521 --> 00:17:45,981
Come on, Bart.
You gotta get out of here.
321
00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:49,526
Pack like you've never packed before.
You know, I have never packed before.
322
00:17:51,362 --> 00:17:52,988
(GRUNTING)
323
00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:54,073
This is hard.
324
00:17:54,156 --> 00:17:56,492
So you're packing. You
must've already heard.
325
00:17:56,659 --> 00:17:59,036
Heard what?
We're going to Aspen.
326
00:17:59,119 --> 00:18:00,663
On a little ski trip.
327
00:18:00,746 --> 00:18:03,749
Ski trip? You won't
know how they'll strike.
328
00:18:04,124 --> 00:18:06,627
A boating accident,
a ski trip.
329
00:18:06,710 --> 00:18:07,711
(SCREAMS)
330
00:18:08,295 --> 00:18:14,510
(SINGING) Scrubbing you is easy
'cause you've been pre-rinsed
331
00:18:14,843 --> 00:18:21,642
And when you're covered with goo
that's when I'm scrubbing you
332
00:18:22,059 --> 00:18:25,354
Scrub-ub-ub-ub-ub
Scrub-ub-ub-ub-ub
333
00:18:25,646 --> 00:18:28,440
Mom, "Bart" has
something to tell you.
334
00:18:29,233 --> 00:18:31,694
I don't like the look
of those air quotes.
335
00:18:31,986 --> 00:18:35,864
So now Bart is on his way to Aspen
where they're going to try to kill him.
336
00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:39,243
Thank you, Future Bart, for traveling
back through time to warn us.
337
00:18:49,003 --> 00:18:52,715
Boy, Aspen sure is ritzy.
Even the winos look better.
338
00:18:53,173 --> 00:18:56,677
We are champagnes.
Who wants a mimosa?
339
00:18:58,137 --> 00:18:59,138
Uh...
340
00:18:59,221 --> 00:19:01,765
This trail is for
experienced skiers.
341
00:19:01,849 --> 00:19:04,018
Which is what you'll be
if you make it to the bottom.
342
00:19:04,101 --> 00:19:05,311
Which you won't.
343
00:19:05,894 --> 00:19:07,438
(BART SCREAMS)
344
00:19:07,896 --> 00:19:11,650
Soon he'll be dead. And
we'll split the inheritance.
345
00:19:11,734 --> 00:19:13,610
Yes, split.
346
00:19:13,694 --> 00:19:14,903
Potato?
347
00:19:17,072 --> 00:19:18,032
(GASPS)
348
00:19:18,115 --> 00:19:19,199
There's Bart!
349
00:19:19,283 --> 00:19:23,912
This looks like a job for Captain Crazy!
Up, up, and away!
350
00:19:24,580 --> 00:19:27,541
Come on, gravity.
You used to be cool.
351
00:19:27,624 --> 00:19:29,209
D'oh!
352
00:19:29,293 --> 00:19:30,836
(HOMER SCREAMS)
353
00:19:32,087 --> 00:19:33,380
Occupied.
354
00:19:35,090 --> 00:19:36,633
(EXCLAIMING)
355
00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:42,139
(BOTH EXCLAIMING)
356
00:19:46,769 --> 00:19:47,728
(SIGHS TIREDLY)
357
00:19:47,811 --> 00:19:50,272
Two hot chocolates,
please.
358
00:19:51,148 --> 00:19:53,275
Are you guests at the lodge? No.
359
00:19:55,444 --> 00:19:57,654
(BOTH SCREAMING)
360
00:19:59,573 --> 00:20:04,953
You know, I feel sorry for you, kid,
going back to that cold, loveless family.
361
00:20:05,621 --> 00:20:07,164
I'll survive.
362
00:20:07,289 --> 00:20:12,294
Your favorite, sir. Hot fudge sundae
with gold leaf and diamond flakes.
363
00:20:15,422 --> 00:20:17,800
Take me with you! I'll be
anything and everything you want!
364
00:20:17,883 --> 00:20:21,011
Don't leave me here with them!
365
00:20:21,095 --> 00:20:24,598
I never thought I'd say this,
but I missed you guys.
366
00:20:24,681 --> 00:20:26,183
Even what's-her-name...
Lisa.
367
00:20:26,266 --> 00:20:27,267
(LISA GRUNTS ANGRILY)
368
00:20:29,144 --> 00:20:33,482
Now we tuck in the tummy,
the tushy, and the tootsies.
369
00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:34,858
(MARGE GIBBERING)
370
00:20:34,942 --> 00:20:36,527
(BART LAUGHING)
371
00:20:41,115 --> 00:20:42,741
This is the life.
372
00:21:35,669 --> 00:21:36,670
English - US - PSDH