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(SINGING) The Simpsons
2
00:00:11,428 --> 00:00:13,096
RALPH: I see stars!
3
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(SCHOOL BELL RINGING)
4
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Bart!
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(HORN BELLOWING)
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(LENNY SHRIEKS)
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(PLAYING DIFFERENT TUNE)
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(TIRES SCREECHING)
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(HONKING)
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(EXCLAIMING)
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00:01:02,062 --> 00:01:03,146
(TIRES SCREECHING)
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D'oh!
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(TIRES SCREECHING)
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(ALL EXCLAIMING)
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(HOMER SCREAMS)
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(COUCH SNUFFLING)
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(SINGING) O Mardi
Gras, O Mardi Gras
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You see a lot of boobies
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Boy, where are my
zydeco records?
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00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:51,319
There's twelve more boxes
and they all sound the same.
21
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I know they do. But the
Simpson Mardi Gras party
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has been a tradition since
two days before you were born.
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And we spare no expense!
24
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What about my birthday party?
25
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This counts as that.
26
00:02:02,664 --> 00:02:04,249
Ladies, how are you
doing with the float?
27
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Fine. But I wish you'd
picked an easier theme
28
00:02:06,668 --> 00:02:08,712
than Super Jet
Dinosaur Fun Monkeys.
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What does that even mean?
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Homie, every year this
party gets a little bigger.
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I'm afraid it's growing
outofhand.
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Hey, Homer, I have
some distant relatives
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that I never see
except for this party.
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Can I bring them
to the party?
35
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No problem.
36
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Just so you know, some of them
act like they hate America.
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But what they really hate
are Americans.
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(GROANS)
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Marge, lighten up. Even
Grampa's enjoying himself.
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(BAND PLAYING LIVELY MUSIC)
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I officially declare this private
party in some guy's backyard open!
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(ALL WHOOPING)
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(MOBILE PHONE RINGING)
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It's my wife! Everyone, pretend
this is a trade seminar in Zurich.
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(ALL MUTTERING INCOHERENTLY)
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I can't talk now, dear.
47
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It's 4:00 in the morning
here in Zurich.
48
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I... Oh, right.
We came together.
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00:03:06,519 --> 00:03:08,313
(PLAYING CHEERFUL MUSIC)
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HOMER: Hey! There you go!
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00:03:17,781 --> 00:03:20,575
Eat my food!
Drink of my drink!
52
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Put your coat on my
daughter's bed, I command you!
53
00:03:24,954 --> 00:03:28,833
Your majesty, did you remember
to invite Ned Flanders?
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00:03:31,002 --> 00:03:32,253
(GROANS)
55
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As the worm said to
the plate of spaghetti, I...
56
00:03:37,842 --> 00:03:41,721
Fine. I'll invite him. But he
has to wear the outfit I choose.
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00:03:44,891 --> 00:03:48,937
Hey, Flanders. Listen,
we're having a party.
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00:03:49,020 --> 00:03:50,230
(VOMITS)
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00:03:50,313 --> 00:03:51,272
lnoflced.
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00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:53,942
So, anyway, if you're
not doing anything,
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00:03:54,025 --> 00:03:59,280
and it looks like you are,
you're welcome to stop by or not!
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(MOANING)
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00:04:02,826 --> 00:04:06,413
Well, Homer, maybe I could use a
break from the old weed and feed.
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00:04:06,996 --> 00:04:09,332
Man, you really
are into me, huh?
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00:04:09,499 --> 00:04:12,794
What are you?
Some kind of talking dog?
66
00:04:13,628 --> 00:04:14,129
Sure.
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00:04:14,337 --> 00:04:16,673
(BAND PLAYING WHEN THE
SAINTS GO MARCHING /N)
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00:04:20,510 --> 00:04:22,762
Three, two, one.
69
00:04:22,846 --> 00:04:24,347
It's Ash Wednesday, everybody!
70
00:04:24,431 --> 00:04:26,850
Set down your gins
and confess your sins!
71
00:04:26,933 --> 00:04:28,685
(ALL BOOING)
72
00:04:42,365 --> 00:04:43,491
(BELCHES)
73
00:04:47,912 --> 00:04:49,205
Homer, I always wonder,
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00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:51,749
how can you afford this
party year after year?
75
00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:56,212
Because I have this magical
thing called a home equity loan.
76
00:04:56,296 --> 00:05:00,758
I borrow all the money I want and
the house gets stuck with the bill.
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00:05:00,842 --> 00:05:02,135
(CHUCKLES)
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00:05:02,218 --> 00:05:03,261
Sucker.
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00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:05,763
I'm not sure
that's how it works.
80
00:05:05,972 --> 00:05:08,975
Fine, Mr. Skeptical.
Give me back your beads!
81
00:05:09,058 --> 00:05:10,059
But... But... But...
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00:05:10,143 --> 00:05:11,186
Beads, please.
83
00:05:20,570 --> 00:05:23,239
Homie, do you know
anything about this?
84
00:05:23,364 --> 00:05:24,949
Marge, don't worry.
85
00:05:25,033 --> 00:05:27,202
It's like when we stopped
paying the phone bill.
86
00:05:27,285 --> 00:05:29,829
They stopped calling us.
In fact, everyone did.
87
00:05:29,913 --> 00:05:32,332
I think we should go see
our mortgage broker.
88
00:05:32,415 --> 00:05:34,375
Oh, man.
Who'd think the first day
89
00:05:34,459 --> 00:05:36,419
of Lent would be
such a bummer?
90
00:05:36,586 --> 00:05:37,921
(DOG BARKING)
91
00:05:39,297 --> 00:05:41,716
Let's see here.
A balloon payment,
92
00:05:41,966 --> 00:05:44,427
37 % interest
compounded every minute,
93
00:05:44,511 --> 00:05:46,846
not understanding
the contract fee
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00:05:46,930 --> 00:05:48,932
(HUMMING)
95
00:05:49,307 --> 00:05:51,100
and here's your
new monthly payment.
96
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:52,185
(BOTH GASP)
97
00:05:52,268 --> 00:05:54,854
That number's so big
it has a comma.
98
00:05:54,938 --> 00:05:56,856
Wait. I left out a zero.
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00:05:56,940 --> 00:05:57,941
Listen, you!
100
00:05:58,024 --> 00:05:59,442
When you gave me that money,
101
00:05:59,526 --> 00:06:02,028
you said I wouldn't have to
repay it till the future!
102
00:06:02,111 --> 00:06:05,031
This isn't the future!
It's the lousy, stinking now!
103
00:06:05,114 --> 00:06:09,786
Now calm down. This country
takes care of its middle class.
104
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:15,542
Now, don't be sore
at the banks.
105
00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:19,921
Hell, we fired our CEO and he
barely got out with $50 million.
106
00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,382
That poor man. Is he okay?
107
00:06:22,465 --> 00:06:25,426
Well, as okay as you can be
in the north of France.
108
00:06:25,510 --> 00:06:30,473
Now here's a free tip from me. Learn
to make soup from rocks and grass.
109
00:06:30,557 --> 00:06:32,642
And what will I cook
that soup on?
110
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Come on, Marge. You got the sun.
You got hobo fires.
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00:06:35,853 --> 00:06:37,438
I can't do all
the work for you.
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(GROANS)
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(MUMBLING INCOHERENTLY)
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I worked so hard to make
this house into a home,
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00:06:55,790 --> 00:06:58,126
and now somebody else
is just going to take it.
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Marge, I'm so sorry.
117
00:07:00,044 --> 00:07:02,422
Why are you here?
You already own a home.
118
00:07:02,505 --> 00:07:04,257
Hey, our au pair
has to live somewhere.
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00:07:04,340 --> 00:07:07,969
This crap shack makes your guest
room look like Winter Palace.
120
00:07:08,094 --> 00:07:10,847
I know. I know.
But Bernice wants you out.
121
00:07:11,055 --> 00:07:13,933
Don't worry, honey.
We'll come out ahead.
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I ripped all the copper wire
out of the walls.
123
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Did you remember
to disconnect it first?
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Did I what now?
125
00:07:23,067 --> 00:07:24,360
(YELLS)
126
00:07:28,531 --> 00:07:29,949
(SOBS)
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I know I shouldn't get
too attached to a building,
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00:07:32,535 --> 00:07:35,538
but that's where Lisa
took her first step.
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00:07:36,831 --> 00:07:38,124
The kids' height,
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Homer's weight.
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(sesame)
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This is so hard because I always
thought Mom was the strong one.
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She is. Look.
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(sesame)
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Goodbye.
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00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:02,482
D'oh!
137
00:08:02,565 --> 00:08:05,652
For sale,
742 Evergreen Terrace,
138
00:08:05,735 --> 00:08:09,489
detached single-family dwelling.
Now who will start me off?
139
00:08:09,656 --> 00:08:11,199
Anybody ever get murdered
in this house?
140
00:08:11,282 --> 00:08:12,325
No.
141
00:08:12,408 --> 00:08:13,951
Thank you for your time.
142
00:08:14,035 --> 00:08:15,662
$100,000.
143
00:08:15,745 --> 00:08:17,830
Sir, what exactly do you
plan to do with this place?
144
00:08:17,914 --> 00:08:20,166
I need a place to
store my cufflinks.
145
00:08:20,249 --> 00:08:23,086
Let's go, kids.
I can't watch anymore.
146
00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:25,713
I have $100,000, going once.
147
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:30,843
Going twice.
148
00:08:32,637 --> 00:08:34,347
$101,000!
149
00:08:34,430 --> 00:08:35,431
(ALL GASPING)
150
00:08:36,933 --> 00:08:40,603
Pass. I've already lifted this
thing once today. I'm not Hercules.
151
00:08:40,687 --> 00:08:44,023
Sold! Okay, folks.
Hand in your paddles.
152
00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:47,068
Round ends together, please.
Round end...
153
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:50,071
What is this?
Randomly-tossing-your-paddle day?
154
00:08:50,154 --> 00:08:52,782
Ned, you bought our house.
155
00:08:52,865 --> 00:08:53,866
Why?
156
00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:55,034
So I can rent it back to you.
157
00:08:55,118 --> 00:08:57,370
Just pay what you can till
you get back on your feet.
158
00:08:57,453 --> 00:09:02,458
Ned Flanders, I can't believe
what you doodily-did for us.
159
00:09:02,625 --> 00:09:06,546
Well, as the ocean said to the
dirt, I appreciate the sediment.
160
00:09:07,964 --> 00:09:11,926
And on the zillionth day,
God created hugs!
161
00:09:12,135 --> 00:09:14,679
And it was good!
162
00:09:16,222 --> 00:09:19,600
Come on, kids. Let's take
our stuff back inside.
163
00:09:19,684 --> 00:09:20,810
(STUTTERING)
164
00:09:21,144 --> 00:09:27,316
Better let me go first. I left a little
surprise upstairs for the new owner.
165
00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:29,777
(EXCLAIMING ANXIOUSLY)
166
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(SINGING) For he's
a fabulous Flanders
167
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Which nobody can deny
168
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He saved our ass
169
00:09:53,634 --> 00:09:55,511
Okay, everyone, squeeze in!
170
00:09:59,515 --> 00:10:00,516
(CAMERA CLICKS)
171
00:10:00,850 --> 00:10:02,435
BART: Evil triumphs again.
172
00:10:02,518 --> 00:10:03,978
(LAUGHS)
173
00:10:04,061 --> 00:10:05,062
Ow!
174
00:10:05,146 --> 00:10:06,147
(LAUGHS)
175
00:10:06,314 --> 00:10:08,149
(HUMMING)
176
00:10:09,692 --> 00:10:12,445
Homie, the faucet
won't stop leaking.
177
00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:16,741
No problem. Just let Sir
Fix-A-Lot slay this chore.
178
00:10:26,918 --> 00:10:27,960
Next problem.
179
00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:30,755
Say, Homer, why don't you let
me take a peek at that leak?
180
00:10:30,838 --> 00:10:32,965
Ned, please.
You're our guest.
181
00:10:33,049 --> 00:10:35,134
Well, actually,
as your landlord,
182
00:10:35,218 --> 00:10:37,136
repairs are my responsibility.
183
00:10:37,220 --> 00:10:38,721
I'll just get my tools.
184
00:10:44,227 --> 00:10:46,020
Try her now, Marge.
185
00:10:46,979 --> 00:10:48,773
Hot comes out of hot.
186
00:10:48,856 --> 00:10:51,651
It's like I'm dreaming.
Thank you, Ned.
187
00:10:51,734 --> 00:10:53,152
Well, I guess
I'd better be...
188
00:10:53,236 --> 00:10:54,278
Do you have time to look at
189
00:10:54,362 --> 00:10:57,615
a few other leaks, faulty wires
and dangerous mold conditions?
190
00:10:57,698 --> 00:11:00,701
(SIGHS) Well, as you are my
tenants, I'll see what I can do.
191
00:11:01,702 --> 00:11:04,413
Well, let's see what else
is in the job jar.
192
00:11:05,873 --> 00:11:09,919
It's so beautiful.
No two are exactly alike,
193
00:11:10,002 --> 00:11:11,838
though many of them
are very similar.
194
00:11:13,214 --> 00:11:14,924
(HUMMING)
195
00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:16,676
(EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST)
196
00:11:18,594 --> 00:11:19,595
(EXCLAIMS IN EXCITEMENT)
197
00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:22,098
I'm back, baby!
198
00:11:26,602 --> 00:11:27,603
(GROANS)
199
00:11:27,895 --> 00:11:29,188
It's irresistible!
200
00:11:29,272 --> 00:11:31,524
You ask him to do
something and he does it.
201
00:11:31,607 --> 00:11:32,859
He's like a genie.
202
00:11:32,942 --> 00:11:34,902
When I was putting new
insulation in your attic,
203
00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:36,112
I slipped on this lamp,
204
00:11:36,195 --> 00:11:38,030
and really banged my head.
205
00:11:38,114 --> 00:11:40,116
So unless you have
anything else for me...
206
00:11:40,199 --> 00:11:44,495
No, no. I'm just happy I
can finally serve this cake.
207
00:11:44,620 --> 00:11:46,789
(MARGE READING)
208
00:11:47,790 --> 00:11:49,041
(TELEPHONE RINGS)
209
00:11:49,125 --> 00:11:50,084
Hello?
210
00:11:50,167 --> 00:11:52,420
Ned, I think
we have a gas leak!
211
00:11:55,298 --> 00:11:57,884
Well, sorry. I just had
my glass of warm milk,
212
00:11:57,967 --> 00:12:00,386
which means I am
closed for business.
213
00:12:00,469 --> 00:12:01,554
He won't come over!
214
00:12:01,637 --> 00:12:02,722
He what?
215
00:12:02,847 --> 00:12:05,808
Flanders, landlords like you
are the scum of the earth!
216
00:12:05,892 --> 00:12:09,604
You lounge around in your Ed
McMansions and we never see you
217
00:12:09,687 --> 00:12:11,022
unless the rent check's late!
218
00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:12,148
The rent check is late.
219
00:12:13,190 --> 00:12:14,734
Some friend you are!
220
00:12:14,817 --> 00:12:17,904
The minute you become our landlord,
you expect us to pay rent?
221
00:12:17,987 --> 00:12:20,948
You'd betterjust pray I don't
find out where you live!
222
00:12:21,032 --> 00:12:23,117
Bart! Don't forget
to turn the chicken.
223
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:27,747
People like Flanders
make me sick.
224
00:12:27,830 --> 00:12:30,333
If I was Marge's landlord,
I'd fix her pipes
225
00:12:30,416 --> 00:12:32,209
and I'd shower her
with flowers
226
00:12:32,293 --> 00:12:35,630
and take her on a romantic
getaway to the South Seas
227
00:12:35,838 --> 00:12:37,632
and I'd never return.
228
00:12:37,715 --> 00:12:40,009
Yeah, you'd treat her right.
229
00:12:40,092 --> 00:12:42,178
Well, here's how you
get back at Flanders.
230
00:12:42,261 --> 00:12:44,388
You go to the media
and you get them to expose
231
00:12:44,472 --> 00:12:46,474
what a horrible person
he really is.
232
00:12:46,557 --> 00:12:49,101
Oh, right.
Like Dateline did to you.
233
00:12:49,185 --> 00:12:50,311
Yeah, three times.
234
00:12:50,394 --> 00:12:53,272
The last one was nominated for
a Peabody, whatever that is.
235
00:12:53,356 --> 00:12:57,777
This is Kent Brockman with a
Channel 6 exclusive, "The Evil Ned."
236
00:12:58,110 --> 00:13:02,406
742 Evergreen Terrace, a tiny
slice of suburban heaven.
237
00:13:02,490 --> 00:13:05,451
But like dating an actress,
what seemed like heaven
238
00:13:05,534 --> 00:13:07,536
soon turned to hell.
239
00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:11,707
HOMER: (DISTORTED) We live in a
house that is trying to kill us.
240
00:13:12,500 --> 00:13:13,960
Hey,Dad.
241
00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:17,964
Who is this "Dad" you
speak of, Lisa Simpson?
242
00:13:18,047 --> 00:13:19,090
You want a cookie, Dad?
243
00:13:19,173 --> 00:13:20,174
Yes.
244
00:13:20,883 --> 00:13:23,594
Squeaky stair here,
scary portrait there.
245
00:13:23,719 --> 00:13:25,763
Poltergeist in the closet.
246
00:13:26,305 --> 00:13:27,932
(IMITATES GHOST)
247
00:13:28,015 --> 00:13:30,309
I died when Homer sat on me.
248
00:13:30,393 --> 00:13:32,061
Why you little...
249
00:13:32,269 --> 00:13:34,146
I'm the victim here!
250
00:13:34,230 --> 00:13:35,773
(GRUNTING)
251
00:13:35,856 --> 00:13:38,150
So who is responsible
for these outrages?
252
00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:41,195
The man whose side of the story
we didn't even bother to get,
253
00:13:41,278 --> 00:13:42,488
Ned Flanders,
254
00:13:42,571 --> 00:13:45,282
the worst person
who ever lived.
255
00:13:45,366 --> 00:13:48,077
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
256
00:13:52,164 --> 00:13:54,166
Let's see what else is on.
257
00:13:58,045 --> 00:13:59,505
Oh, this is good.
258
00:14:04,010 --> 00:14:07,805
Homer Simpson, I took pity on
you, and what do I get in return?
259
00:14:07,888 --> 00:14:09,890
A kick in the kadiddle hopper!
260
00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:11,100
(LAUGHING) Kadiddle hopper!
261
00:14:11,183 --> 00:14:14,061
It's not funny.
That's how I swear.
262
00:14:14,145 --> 00:14:16,897
Fine. You're mad. What
are you gonna do about it?
263
00:14:16,981 --> 00:14:19,692
When the month is up,
I want you out!
264
00:14:19,984 --> 00:14:21,777
Fine!
I'll get another neighbor
265
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:23,612
to buy the house
and let us live in it.
266
00:14:23,738 --> 00:14:24,822
We won't do it!
267
00:14:24,905 --> 00:14:27,033
Your leaving is
our Christmas!
268
00:14:27,283 --> 00:14:31,871
Flanders, you wouldn't throw
us out on Christmas, would you?
269
00:14:31,954 --> 00:14:32,955
(GRUNTS ANGRILY)
270
00:14:35,291 --> 00:14:37,251
(HOMER IMITATING GHOST)
271
00:14:41,964 --> 00:14:43,507
What? Who is that?
272
00:14:43,591 --> 00:14:46,052
It is me, Jesus.
273
00:14:46,260 --> 00:14:49,680
I have come from my workshop
in the North Pole to say,
274
00:14:49,764 --> 00:14:52,391
don't evict the Simpsons!
275
00:14:52,933 --> 00:14:56,562
Say, Jesus, what was the name
of the son of Zachariah?
276
00:14:56,645 --> 00:15:00,816
It was... Do you have
a computer nearby?
277
00:15:04,487 --> 00:15:06,614
He's nailing something
to our door.
278
00:15:07,364 --> 00:15:09,075
I wonder if it's theses.
279
00:15:09,241 --> 00:15:10,284
That's gross.
280
00:15:10,367 --> 00:15:13,120
Homie, I think it's
an eviction notice.
281
00:15:13,287 --> 00:15:17,208
We're gonna be homeless like
Lucille Ball in the Stone Pillow!
282
00:15:17,291 --> 00:15:18,542
Don't worry, Marge.
283
00:15:18,626 --> 00:15:22,129
According to this chapter
book, we have a secret weapon.
284
00:15:22,213 --> 00:15:25,299
"Evictee will be granted
a stay of eviction
285
00:15:25,382 --> 00:15:29,428
"if said household includes
a resident aged 65 or over."
286
00:15:29,512 --> 00:15:32,306
Finally, a practical use
for my father.
287
00:15:32,598 --> 00:15:36,310
Whee! I'm gonna live like
a human in a real house.
288
00:15:37,436 --> 00:15:38,562
What's the catch?
289
00:15:38,646 --> 00:15:39,688
I'm using you.
290
00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:41,398
For what?
My own devices.
291
00:15:41,482 --> 00:15:42,817
All right.
292
00:15:44,110 --> 00:15:46,278
Tell the world
what you saw here.
293
00:15:46,362 --> 00:15:49,365
I'm gonna miss putting makeup
on him while he sleeps.
294
00:15:49,532 --> 00:15:51,367
ATTENDANT:
I've already moved on.
295
00:15:52,493 --> 00:15:54,203
(GROANS)
296
00:15:56,163 --> 00:15:58,791
Hey, Flanders.
You can't evict us
297
00:15:58,874 --> 00:16:01,377
because a senior's
living here now!
298
00:16:01,836 --> 00:16:03,129
(LAUGHING)
299
00:16:03,212 --> 00:16:05,798
You're never too old to
ruin things for the young.
300
00:16:05,881 --> 00:16:07,675
(HUMMING HAPPILY)
301
00:16:14,557 --> 00:16:18,227
Will you kids knock it off!
I'm trying to watch badminton!
302
00:16:18,894 --> 00:16:21,647
Dad, we've been trapped
in the house for days.
303
00:16:21,730 --> 00:16:23,149
Can't we play outside?
304
00:16:23,232 --> 00:16:26,443
Yeah. Without the sun, my hair
is reverting to its natural red.
305
00:16:26,527 --> 00:16:29,113
I don't want to be called
Rusty again. I don't!
306
00:16:29,196 --> 00:16:32,867
You know, it says here that
Grampa has to remain in the house,
307
00:16:32,950 --> 00:16:34,326
but we don't.
308
00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:36,537
How about a family outing?
309
00:16:36,871 --> 00:16:39,623
Family outing?
I'll start. Lisa's gay!
310
00:16:39,748 --> 00:16:42,334
Right. 'Cause I wouldn't want
to be gay like my heroes,
311
00:16:42,418 --> 00:16:46,005
Billie Jean King, Susan
Sontag, Sappho of Lesbos
312
00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:48,090
and,lsuspecL
Peppermint Patty.
313
00:16:48,299 --> 00:16:50,342
Well, I guess we could
take a quick walk.
314
00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:52,636
We'll keep Grampa
occupied with this DVD
315
00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:54,930
of Dwight Eisenhower
talking about golf.
316
00:16:55,097 --> 00:16:56,932
EISENHOWER ON TV: Now, when
I've got a downhill lie,
317
00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:58,350
I like to swing wide,
318
00:16:58,434 --> 00:17:00,603
just like Patton did
when he swung past
319
00:17:00,686 --> 00:17:02,813
Kesselring's boys in
the Ardennes Forest.
320
00:17:02,897 --> 00:17:04,064
Let's watch.
321
00:17:06,108 --> 00:17:07,318
(MACHINE GUNS FIRING)
322
00:17:11,780 --> 00:17:14,450
This is what I call
living in the past.
323
00:17:19,371 --> 00:17:21,874
So after I paid for
the ice cream cones,
324
00:17:21,957 --> 00:17:24,877
I said thank you
and was on my way.
325
00:17:25,294 --> 00:17:27,379
We know, Dad. We were there.
326
00:17:27,463 --> 00:17:30,216
(CHUCKLES) I know
it seems that way
327
00:17:30,299 --> 00:17:32,051
because I'm such
a vivid storyteller.
328
00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:34,720
Now here's another story
called "Bart's Mistake."
329
00:17:34,803 --> 00:17:35,846
We were walking home when...
330
00:17:35,930 --> 00:17:36,931
(GASPS)
331
00:17:39,016 --> 00:17:40,392
How could this have happened?
332
00:17:40,476 --> 00:17:42,353
Because your father
lives with me now.
333
00:17:42,436 --> 00:17:44,647
Flanders feeds
me people food!
334
00:17:44,730 --> 00:17:46,482
Well, I can't
compete with that.
335
00:17:48,192 --> 00:17:51,445
Oh, my God.
We're out on the street.
336
00:17:52,905 --> 00:17:54,156
(sesame)
337
00:17:54,990 --> 00:17:57,660
Honey, don't cry.
It could be worse.
338
00:17:57,993 --> 00:18:00,246
At least it's not raining.
339
00:18:02,373 --> 00:18:05,084
See? I told you it's not raining.
So we're just homeless.
340
00:18:09,046 --> 00:18:11,757
Kids, if you get lost,
remember where we are,
341
00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:16,262
75 beds from that wall and
100 beds from the crazy guy.
342
00:18:16,345 --> 00:18:18,264
CRAZY GUY: ...probably
the best I've ever seen
343
00:18:18,347 --> 00:18:19,348
although he stole the idea
344
00:18:19,431 --> 00:18:21,100
from Amelia Earhart so...
345
00:18:21,183 --> 00:18:22,309
I hate this place!
346
00:18:22,393 --> 00:18:25,437
The clothes they gave us are the
clothes we gave to charity last year.
347
00:18:25,521 --> 00:18:28,065
There's a lesson here.
Life is fickle.
348
00:18:28,148 --> 00:18:31,735
You should appreciate every...
Stop kicking, Bart!
349
00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:33,779
But kicking is
the only toy I have.
350
00:18:33,862 --> 00:18:36,782
That's not true. You have
bug bites you can scratch.
351
00:18:37,283 --> 00:18:39,535
This is the lowest
we've sunk.
352
00:18:39,618 --> 00:18:42,538
CRAZY GUY: That's the answer!
Pawn to king's bishop four!
353
00:18:45,124 --> 00:18:47,710
You two are the kind of tenants
every landlord dreams of.
354
00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:50,546
Excellent credit.
Christian but not Baptist.
355
00:18:50,671 --> 00:18:52,464
And let's see,
according to your application,
356
00:18:52,548 --> 00:18:54,508
you only have sex
for procreation.
357
00:18:54,591 --> 00:18:55,718
If that.
358
00:18:56,760 --> 00:18:59,346
Well, now I'll just put
my John Hancock on the dock
359
00:18:59,430 --> 00:19:01,849
and you can give me
the key to the lock.
360
00:19:02,016 --> 00:19:04,018
My ballpoint's all
clicked up for you.
361
00:19:04,101 --> 00:19:05,144
No, thanks.
362
00:19:05,227 --> 00:19:08,105
Don't believe in borrowing
things from the neighbor.
363
00:19:08,272 --> 00:19:09,690
Lord, you said
love thy neighbor,
364
00:19:09,773 --> 00:19:12,234
but you didn't have
to make it so easy.
365
00:19:12,651 --> 00:19:15,029
What you got there,
Wolfie Goldberg?
366
00:19:15,446 --> 00:19:16,739
Who's this?
367
00:19:17,281 --> 00:19:20,117
That's just a family
who used to
368
00:19:20,743 --> 00:19:24,079
make my life interesting.
369
00:19:24,163 --> 00:19:26,457
I'll just add
my initials there.
370
00:19:26,707 --> 00:19:31,420
(SINGING) For he's
a fabulous Flanders
371
00:19:31,670 --> 00:19:32,671
There.
372
00:19:32,755 --> 00:19:35,591
Which nobody can deny
373
00:19:35,924 --> 00:19:37,926
And there! Exciting.
374
00:19:40,929 --> 00:19:41,930
(SNIFFLING)
375
00:19:43,265 --> 00:19:44,308
Folks...
376
00:19:44,391 --> 00:19:45,351
And leased!
377
00:19:45,434 --> 00:19:47,102
...I'm afraid
you can't live here.
378
00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:49,355
Roger Dodger.
Back in the car, Nance.
379
00:19:49,438 --> 00:19:51,190
Yay! But why?
380
00:19:51,357 --> 00:19:53,734
Well, the people
who lived here before
381
00:19:54,401 --> 00:19:56,612
weren't always the best
neighbors, but I love them.
382
00:19:56,695 --> 00:20:00,616
And you can't be a saint unless
you live among the lepers.
383
00:20:00,949 --> 00:20:01,909
I hope you don't mind.
384
00:20:01,992 --> 00:20:04,244
And I hope you
won't mind when we sue.
385
00:20:04,328 --> 00:20:05,871
I think you should.
The court papers
386
00:20:05,954 --> 00:20:07,790
will be a great way
to stay in touch.
387
00:20:07,873 --> 00:20:10,000
Well, hasn't this been
a peach of a breach?
388
00:20:10,084 --> 00:20:11,043
(LAUGHING)
389
00:20:11,126 --> 00:20:12,378
We'll see you in court.
390
00:20:12,461 --> 00:20:16,840
Flanders, I promise I'll never
abuse our friendship again.
391
00:20:16,924 --> 00:20:18,217
It's okay if you
backslide a little.
392
00:20:18,300 --> 00:20:19,343
Never!
393
00:20:19,426 --> 00:20:21,804
Hooray for stupid Flanders!
394
00:20:22,096 --> 00:20:24,306
The Simpsons are back!
395
00:20:29,603 --> 00:20:31,688
I really hate
this neighborhood.
396
00:21:27,035 --> 00:21:28,036
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